Africa or Bust

Late-night calls home for a parent to come pick me up from whoever's house I was sleeping-over at were not uncommon during my formidable years. I would be fine until it was time to go to sleep. Then, I would get panicky. My stomach would start to hurt. I wouldn't be able to breath. Then, the fear would creep in, forcing me to tell my friend that I wanted to go home. The shame of being the big baby who had to go home in the middle of the night was NEVER more than the fear of having to stay.

So, I quickly dismissed the fleeting thoughts of my going to Africa to do mission work. That would be a really expensive phone call, a smidgen more than a quick drive through the neighborhood to get me, and the shame factor amps a little considering I'm 32.

But, still the whispers of the Lord to go to Africa. There is much work to be done there. "...here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8b

I went to a little junior college nestled in a quaint little west Texas town for my freshmen year. Well, half of my freshmen year. It seems that, although bustling during the week, little junior colleges roll up their sidewalks and bed down for the weekend. This was not ideal for a car-less newbie freshmen who was homesick before she even pulled out of the driveway. I cried for four months straight. I had near-constant stomach aches, I ate sporadically, and slept less. I contemplated how much nicer death would be if it meant I could, at least, be at home. I filed transfer papers before midterms. I was completely packed and drove to my last final that December. I was home by supper.

But, still the whispers of the Lord to go to Africa. There is much work to be done there. "...here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8b

The transition to being among the working class in Dallas was quite a bit less traumatic. I only cried for a few days. The stomach aches subsided after a few months. And I had a car that I drove back and forth from Abilene to Dallas frequently. I held myself together during the day. And, at all other times, I kept myself very busy. I read a lot. I would go driving, just to prove to myself that I wasn't "stuck" anywhere.

But, still the whispers of the Lord to go to Africa. There is much work to be done there. "...here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8b

These whispers have to be from the Lord. I would NEVER, on purpose, decide that I needed to travel to a whole other continent for any length of time to do anything. That is so very far out of my comfort zone.

And, I think that is precisely why God has been calling me to Africa; to think of someone else's needs; to work myself to exhaustion for someone who cannot repay me; to get a much-needed, swift kick in the perspective; to show me how futile my superiority complex is; to help me recognize that this world is not my home, and that I should never feel so comfortable that I would rather be here than at Home with Him.

"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8